update on rachel and upcoming video

hi,

I finally have found the courage and will set up my webcam and will do a utube videos starting next weekend. my major problem is time. I want to share so much to help people which in turns accelerates my healing and the estrogen treatment. however I may not have enough time today to do my first video.

yesterday I realized that so much of my journey on hormones can not be  experienced by others  and that is because of my willingness to sell me and my  personal and professional life. so many on hormones do not have a true support system that is as diverse as mine. the men and women you will never see are my angels and in my darkest hours they hold me up and ensure I am protected from my own worst enemy, me.

I literally do not have any glbt friends. all of my friends are women with strong ethics and drive ; ohhh that is me too. none of my friends toe the party line of any subculture but have strong views and express them in very positive ways.  so many times people say to me , " rachel all the others, referring to transgenders, have gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgendered friends. I have only friends and all are very spiritual and ethical. this is the rachel difference.

also the rachel difference is that the rules of society don't apply to me and that is not a transgendered thing but it is my electric smile , passion and heart that draws people to me. it is my natural god given gift to speak from my heart to anyone on the street, literally, to the leaders of society. ohhh that right I see people as human  beings.

case and point and yes this is very typical in my life. when I was 16 I went in for a job interview at jc penny's for a "bus boy" position to wash dishes.  I walked into the interview and I instantly recognized the interviewer as my 7th grade student math teach. i said  nothing, then he said, " ... you are don reid" I said, " yes." that was the end of the interview and he simply said you will love it here..  he had known me a few years ago from my 7th grade math class because he had helped me numerous times with math..  this is where others would say this rarely happens but in my world this is a typical day.  i can connect with people and this is truly a gift from god very, very  few have.

I feel the need to help others and use my passion and belief in god for the good of humanity.  i am just me and I simply do my part. also as a friend told me , " if this was easy anyone could do it." I am scared to death of putting my personal life on video but I cannot stop nor do I want to stop something that was started in february 2012. the speech at the regional va conference pulled me out of the hell of isolation.

the key to this whole process on hormones is merging your past with the present. but to lead from the front and pull out the past which will possibly include my family and friends from years ago will take the strength that only god and my spiritual friends can help guide me through. this mission is not for the weak but that does not mean I will not cry and hurt in the process.

any of you that read my blog that believe in god simply pray for me as I undertake something so important to so many and heal my heart and soul in the process.

thank you and god bless

rachel